Dan Paladini (Chivas USA): Against a severely depleted Toronto FC, a power strike between two defenders. It was alright.

Jason Garey (Columbus Crew): Chests the ball down and strikes past Reis, who was doing the splits. I might be tempted to vote for this one, but the Crew wear all yellow, which is just ugly; so I just can’t do it.

Will Johnson (Real Salt Lake): Beautiful little one-two (I think that’s how you type that out) to set up the strike, bounce off the right post into the net, and it’s Real Salt Lake scoring away (which almost never happens). But Johnson seems almost angry-happy about the goal, kinda like an “in your face” sort of celebration. I’m not a fan of that. So no voting for Johnson.

Santino Quaranta (DC United): This one is tough for me because if credit were being given to Dyachenko, I might have to strongly consider this for the grit and persistence he displayed in retaining possession. But since Quaranta would get the credit, and though it wasn’t a bad goal, I’m still going to have to pass on this one.

Brad Davis (Houston Dynamo): First, bad idea to have a game at 2 in the afternoon in Houston. I was sweating like a whore in church just sitting there. But both teams played hard, and Davis had a nice first touch strike around a defender and over Hartman who was making some brilliant saves all day long. I like it (surprise, right?).

Get to Jeff’s and realize the TiVo wasn’t set. Crap. Not an auspicious start.

13th Minute: Finally find the game. Seems like I haven’t missed much.

13.5: Maybe I should look up the starting line-ups? Decide that no, I can figure it out as the game goes on.

13.75: Realize the JP players don’t have names on their jerseys – makes figuring out who’s who more difficult.

14: See that Jeff’s computer is gone; so I can’t look up the line-ups if I want to.

14.5: Decide I need a piece of cake.

15.5: Need a drink. Be right back.

16.5: Didn’t miss anything.

22: It is really quiet in the stadium. So quiet I can hear the coaches and players on the field yelling. Not like you hear with HiDef, but like you hear at a reserves game. And there is a lovely parking lot in the background.

23: Announcers call NE “bridesmaids” since they haven’t won a MLS cup. I thought it was funny. Chompers did too.

24: Lots of water being flung around. Guys tipping heads back and letting water run down their fronts. I approve and support water breaks like this.

24.5: JP just put the ball back in play with lots of NE players still getting watered down. Seems a little shady.

25: Here I’ve been thinking the game has been a little slow, but the announcers just informed me that I missed a lot of JP scoring opportunities early in the game. Stupid TiVo.

26: Wells Thompson comes on for Ralston who is having back spasms. And Thompson promptly gets a yellow card.  Kinda like, “Hey, in case you missed it, I came on the field.” But in a really forceful way.

35: Someone from JP pushes down Twellman (sigh) at the top of the box, creating a dangerous free kick situation. I can clearly hear the JP keeper Figueroa moving players around (at least I think that’s what he’s doing, I don’t speak the language). Larentowicz takes it, Figueroa knocks it away.

41: Lots of talk about finding a rhythm. I hope they don’t mean people should use the rhythm method. That clearly doesn’t work well.

44: Keep talking about a JP player named Richardson. No clue which one that is since there are no names on the jerseys, but seems like he must be good. MLS prospect?

45+: Camera man is now shooting images of another camera man who is taping the “crowd.” I think we are all a little bored about now.

Half-time: I assert my mental and physical dominance over Chompers during a rousing game of tug-of-war. He didn’t stand a chance.

46: Lots of face time on Shalrie Joseph. I approve. He’s beautiful. Though I would prefer shorter hair.

49: Depth perception screws me up again. Looked like JP had a goal, but it really just hit the side netting.

51: JP GOAL!!!! For real this time! The 10 people in the crown went wild!

52: Lots of bad hair playing for JP. Shalrie’s is way better. Though it could still be shorter…

55: Another yellow card for some JP player who’s name I still can’t figure out sets up another dangerous free kick for NE – and they get nothing.

61: Announcers agree that Richardson should come on up to the MLS. It’s like they can read my mind.

65: NE avoids getting scored on.

67: Announcer says that NE gets a “second bite of the cherry.” I can infer what that means, but still wonder if it is like a “born again virgin.”

69: JP substitution: Gay in for Nelson.

70: JP GOAL!!! Gay on the assist. So when Thompson comes on for NE, he gets a yellow. Gay comes on for JP, he gets an assist. Story of the night.

73: Good butt shot of the sideline official signaling an offsides. 

74: Mitchell (JP) gets a yellow for a bad foul on Shalrie in the box = PK. Briefly consider flying down and giving a stern talking to Mitchell, but realize I’m tired. Maybe next time.

74.5: Shalrie taking a while to get up. Replay shows a nasty bend on the left ankle. Reconsidering that stern talking to Mitchell.

74.75: Castro takes the PK, and scores!!!!

74.85: Small battle over the ball between Castro and Figueroa. Figueroa wins.

78: Gay gets yellow. Does that mean that Thompson is due to score now?

83: Lots of substitutions happened. I even traded between toys I am throwing for Chompers.

88: Yellow for Parkhurst and free kick for JP in dangerous spot. Nothing.

Game: JP 2, NE 1. Final winner for a spot in Group C will be determined by aggregate goals. So while NE “lost” tonight, there is still the home leg in NE. I’m expecting better play and more of a crowd.

Jimmy Conrad (KC Wizards): Equalizer in second minute of stoppage time against FC Dallas by the team captain with everyone pushing forward. A good goal to score, but I wouldn’t call it pretty or particularly skilled – maybe just a little desperate.

Andre Rocha (FC Dallas): 40 yards out over the heads of everybody. Not bad. 

Joe Vide (DC United): First goal of the season with only minutes remaining in the first half. A covered Emilio pokes back to Vide who, on first touch (I love first touch…) rips the ball past two defenders (one who actually jumps and turns his back towards the ball – maybe attempting to use his butt as a bat?) and over the keeper. I like it.

Mike Magee (NY Red Bulls): Painful for me to watch, but I watched it again anyways (so much for cheering myself up…). Beat Robinson on the run, drills it right over Onstad (best damn goalkeeper in the league) and past Robinson who didn’t make it into the goal to deflect when Onstad came off his line (which I hate). Not bad.

In short, I’m voting for Vide.

Then there is the US MNT beating Guatemala in Guatemala in a World Cup Qualifier. Yay!

Then I was at the game watching the Dynamo wipe the floor with Chivas. I actually felt sorry for Chivas; it was that ugly. With so many injuries (I think 11 players were on the injury list), plus Klejstan out with the US, there just wasn’t much to be done. Preki only used one sub for injury purposes because frankly, there was no one on the bench. By no one, I mean no one healthy (Ante Razov was on the bench, and I don’t consider him a “no one”). If you really love the Dynamo (and who wouldn’t), or really hate Chivas (why?), then you might want to watch this game on TiVo if you missed it live.

Then there were like 80 (exaggerating, but not by much…) other World Cup qualifiers today. So I’m in OVERLOAD. A wonderful overload to be in, but overload nonetheless.

Brian Carroll (Columbus Crew): nod for first goal in this MLS season, but that’s about it.

Jeff Cunningham (FC Dallas): nod for 100th MLS goal, but then he clumsily falls on the goalkeeper.

Ronnie O’Brien (San Jose Earthquakes): One touch over Matt Reis (who I feel is just behind, in my non-biased judgement, the best damn goalkeeper in the league, Pat Onstad) – so not bad

Ricardo Clark (Houston Dynamo): Beautiful. First of the season. 25 yards out (actually remember being at the game and thinking, what the hell is he doing from way out here…oh…scoring a goal).

Mike Magee (New York Red Bulls): Beats defender in foot race to the ball (good), but not a super exciting shot (no need since he beat the defenders).

Dynamo vs Atlante, originally uploaded by William Holtkamp.

At the Dynamo games, Jeff and I think about what we could do to help the team. I feel like I could help them stretch. Really, just for their benefit. And if their shorts slide down a bit and I get flashed, well, I’ll just have to accept that as part of the job.

Gameday: Final – Dynamo win, 4-3: “

That was about as wild a game as you’ll see from the Dynamo in MLS play, but they came out on top of the Western Conference after a crazy 4-3 win. Yura Movsisyan’s third-minute goal and Javier Morales’ 25th-minute goal were sucker punches, but the Dynamo rolled with them and found a way back. Brian Mullan, Brian Ching, Brad Davis, and Craig Waibel all made major contributions to the scoring summary, but the shot of the game was Ricardo Clark’s 35-yard bomb in the 35th minute that gave the Dynamo the lead for good.

Here are some notes from tonight’s game:

· It is the first time in the Dynamo’s three-year history that the team has scored four goals in one half.

· Houston’s come-from-behind win was the first for Houston this year. The Dynamo improved to 1-6-2 in all competitions (1-4-1 MLS) when allowing the first goal.

· Yura Movsisyan’s third-minute goal was only the second goal this season the Dynamo have allowed in the first 15 minutes of a match. The other came June 12 in a 2-0 loss to New England. It was not, however, the earliest goal allowed in Dynamo history. That came June 10, 2006, when the New York Red Bulls scored in the second minute in a game at Giants Stadium.

· Houston midfielder Brian Mullan tied the game in the 16th minute after a visionary pass from Brad Davis found Mullan’s run from deep. The goal gave Mullan a goal or an assist in five of the Dynamo’s last eight games in all competitions, dating back to his goal on July 12.

· The Dynamo’s Brian Ching re-tied the game with a goal in the 29th minute, scoring his ninth goal in his last 11 MLS games. Ching also earned his fourth MLS assist of the season in the 42nd minute, setting up Nate Jaqua for his first MLS goal with the Dynamo this season.

· Midfielder Ricardo Clark scored the go-ahead goal in the 35th minute with a 35-yard blast that beat Nick Rimando to top the left corner. It was Clark’s first MLS goal of the year and his second overall goal; his first came July 19 against D.C. United in SuperLiga play.

Houston is back in action at Robertson Stadium Wednesday night at 8:00 p.m. against Western Conference rival Chivas USA. Don’t miss it!

“

(Via Forever Orange.)

Feilhaber signs with AGF Aarhus: ”

“

(Via Soccer By Ives.)

Well, it now appears that the Danish option is proceeding, full-speed ahead and the deal may be complete in just a few hours.

Feilhaber Update: “Just touched base with Benny Feilhaber’s agent, Lyle Yorks, who is in Aarhus (Denmark) with the USA Olympian. ‘He had his medical and, if all of the final details are agreed, he will sign in the morning,’ Yorks told the Insider. Derby County, Feilhaber’s current club, will let him go on a free transfer. Feilhaber would join another American, Jeremiah White, at the ambitious Danish club. We’ll see if this gets done in the next 24 hrs.”

(Via Soccer Insider – WaPo.)

We’re not ones to post rumors about soccer players (HA!), but we did here given the level of interest surrounding this incredible player and the caliber of the reporters (doesn’t get much better than Ives and Goff). What makes this latest report the most credible is that sources are now going on-record with details. And, truth-be-told, this may be a situation where all of the above is true. Benny (and his people) may be entertaining multiple options at once to see what’s the best one that’ll go through. …and we may soon find out. (fingers crossed)